In the early morning hours
my mind is awake,
a nocturnal playing chase with their own thoughts.
I am nervous
confident
excited
scared.

She enters the room
Mother, this time a shapeshifter.
Where I rest, she takes a seat.
She holds the open sky
with peaceful clouds, endlessly drifting.
She brings the core of this planet
with black lava ever in movement.
She is an ancient tree
with its vines constantly growing.

As my actual mother,
She strokes my hair and kisses my cheek
‘Shush my love! I see your fear.
Here, let me show you your strength, too.’
And she plants
a seed
a pearl
a star
as my third eye.
That brings light
to the dark place that is my mind.

She turns into a female wolf
and holds my gaze with her amber eyes.
She is soft and fierce, protective and caring.
She curls up around my round body.
I surrender into her warm fur.
Within her presence, sleep washes over me.

I wrote this poem on 30/03/2019, two days after my son’s due date. Plagued by insomnia, these images and words brought me back to sleep.
Photo by Jupp. This was the super blood Wolf Moon of January 2019.